“If it isn’t on Google, it doesn’t exist.”–Jimmy Wales
Not that it has anything to do with this post, but I have to start with something: reading the above quote, it also occurs to me that if something is ON Google, it exists whether it wants to or not.
OK, now down to business with another rousing rendition of Search Term Haiku, the game that asks the question, does anybody have a life? Me? My readers? The anonymous boobs who type this drivel into search engines?
To review how this works:
- Every phrase must come from actual search terms that yield this blog in the results, per my WordPress stats page or Google Webmaster Tools page.
- The poems must follow the accepted Anglicized format of the traditional Japanese art form: three lines of 5, 7 and 5 syllables respectively.
- Each line must be comprised of actual search term phrases, verbatim. The only changes allowed are punctuation and truncation and capitalization.
- Words may not be changed or rearranged. Typos and misspellings must not be corrected.
- Phrases may be combined or extended to multiple lines, as long as the previous four conditions are met.
I should point out that the use of terms from Google Webmaster tools is a new feature for episode #5, made necessary by the fact that Google just doesn’t report many search terms to WordPress anymore. Or to anybody else for that matter. But webmaster tools reports oodles (meaning hundreds) of search terms in which a page turns up in, even if not clicked on, so I get to use those. Whatever. I don’t explain Google, I just make fun of the boobs who type dumb things into it.
So here goes nothing.
On the internet
nobody knows you’re a horse
a goat and a pig.
Blague sur le tennis
Pepe Le Pew girl cat name
Cest nes pas un pipe
Osi Umeniora poop
guy has sex with snake.
Siri for dummies
Explain like I’m 5.
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Tyson I.Q. score