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Google This! Search Term Haiku #2

“Anything too stupid to be spoken is sung.”–Voltaire

www.cartoonstock.com Used by permission

http://www.cartoonstock.com
Used by permission

If Voltaire were alive today, he would have said “anything too stupid to be spoken is Googled.”

And with that missive, folks, it’s time for another thrilling rendition of Search Term Haiku.   To recap,  this feature was inspired by blogger  Elkement  when she created search term poetry on her blog, Theory and Practice of Trying to Combine Just Anything.     She suggested I try my hand at it, and I did her one better.   I created search term Haiku,  which must abide by the following rules:

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  1. Every phrase must come from search terms actually used to find this blog, per my WordPress stats page.
  2. The poems must follow the accepted Anglicized format of the traditional Japanese art form: three lines of 5, 7 and 5 syllables respectively.
  3. Each line must constitute an actual individual search term phrase, verbatim.  The only changes allowed are punctuation and truncation.  (Phrases may be taken from within search terms).
  4. Words may not be changed or rearranged. Typos and misspellings must not be corrected.

The poems below have all been created using search terms that have appeared on my WordPress stats page since the last Search Term Haiku post in January of this year.  It should be noted:  adding stories to this blog about my life as the husband of a veterinarian has opened up a whole new world of gross search terms.  I did not make these up, I swear it.  Enjoy.


YUCK

What does poop look like?

Images found on Facebook

When you have pinworms

 

Science Class

Why is the sky plue*?

To Teach Physics to Your Dog

Erwin Schroedinger

 

 

Ah, Me

Mark Sacler* part 3

When you have enough quotes

Rat and pig cartoon

 

 

Canine Crazy

Dog eats brillo pad

At subatomic level

Mental enema

 

 

Zoophilia

Small lazy black dog

Veterinarian spouse

The wife of Luffy

 
* SIC (typos reproduced accurately.)

Comments

  1. Ridiculous and sublime – as usual!! These search terms are amazing – I like the questions in particular. My search terms have settled down to the same, rather dull, repetitions of phrases containing ‘magic gyroscopes’, ‘falling slinkys’ and the like (By commenting like this I hand them over to you). But my searchers don’t ask for anything any more – like ‘What does poop look like?’
    It seems I need to blog more about animals 😉 Or real life stuff in general.

  2. Reblogged this on digger666.

  3. Wow. You really are geekier than I am. That’s not easy. 😛

  4. Search term haiku – cool! Now you’ve got me going as well – here’s the best I could come up with at short notice (but I’ll keep trying):

    left handed redhead
    achieving something in life
    untangling puzzles

  5. Canine Crazy is awesome! Now, I want to try my hand…

  6. If I knew how to write a Haiku I would play along…wait a minute, I’ll just google it!

  7. So. My blog will never have such inspiring search terms, I’m sure. I’m going to have to do some actual *work* to come up with some good ones. I don’t know if you guys heard about this, but NASA is soliciting Haiku poems to go to Mars. It’s been all over the space-geek’s news:
    http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetwo-way/2013/05/02/180532424/send-your-haiku-to-mars-nasa-seeks-poets
    http://cosmiclog.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/05/01/18005173-nasa-lets-poets-send-haiku-to-red-planet-on-a-mavens-wings?lite
    I see this as my only chance to get off this planet…

Trackbacks

  1. […] Google This! Search Term Haiku #2 (millenniumconjectures.com) […]

  2. […] intrepid sports reporter and avant garde poet Mark Sackler of Millennium Conjectures has closed our NFL draft poll, with some exciting results! […]

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