A Blog of the Ridiculous and Sublime, by Mark Sackler
“The problem with quotes on the Internet is that you never know if they are genuine”–Abraham Lincoln
A little nonsense now and then, is relished by the wisest men.
Be assured that all of the Cosmic Quotes on this site are genuine. As in, “I have genuinely researched all of them–on the Internet.” This one included.
“Never let the facts get in the way of a good answer.”–Tom Magliozzi
The icons of Car Talk, Tom and Ray Magliozzi
With a line like that, you’d think he should have been a politician–if not a right-wing talk show host. Thankfully, he was neither. Car Talk co-host Tom Magliozzi died from Alzheimer’s last week. Saturday mornings will never be the same. They’ll certainly never be as funny. R.I.P., Tom.
Several years ago, I was honored to be immortalized by Car Talk when they used my puzzler submission entitled “Strange Accident.” I can’t seem to find the podcast of it–let me know if you can–but here is a reference to it on the Car Talk web site.
“It’s pointless to have a nice clean desk, because it means you’re not doing anything.”–Michio Kaku
Moi?
Whew. If a guy that smart says it, it has to be true!
“Creationists make it sound as if ‘theory’ is something you dreamed up after being drunk all night.”–Isaac Asimov
“A scientific theory is a well-substantiated explanation of some aspect of the natural world that is acquired through the scientific method, and repeatedly confirmed through observation and experimentation.”–Wikipedia.
Period.
“You’re on earth. There’s no cure for that.”–Samuel Beckett
“We’ve got to reinvest in space travel. We should have never left the moon.”–Ray Bradbury
“To the moon, Alice!”–Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden on “The Honeymooners”
Samuel Beckett clearly never spoke to the cow. Ray Bradbury should have. Jackie Gleason obviously did.
(illustration attribution unknown)
“I have a problem with religion or anything else that says ‘we have all the answers.’ We’re complex, we change our minds on issues all the time. Religion leaves no room for human complexity.”–Daniel Radcliffe
My head says he’s right, but my heart is broken. I always thought Harry Potter had all the answers. The moral of this story? Never trust anyone with “The Mark of Zorro” on his forehead.
“The Guide is definitive. Reality is often inaccurate.”–Douglas Adams, “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy”
Counting down to the only true holiday on the Gregorian calendar–Towel Day!
“When I die, I’m leaving my body to science fiction.”–Steven Wright
Steven Wright. Would science take this?
When I die, I’m just leaving. Happy paraprosdokian spring.
“Perfect numbers, like perfect men, are very rare.”–Rene Descartes
Happy Pi Day to all you Sheldon Coopers and Amy Farrah Fowlers out there. With Towel Day right around the corner, it’s time to get down, get serious, and do some math. Please solve the following equation: 1 + X = π, and if you are irrational enough to find a rational number for X, either get your own blog or see a shrink. I’ve done both. See you May 25th.
“Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.”–Ronald Reagan
“May God save the country, for it is evident the people will not.”–Millard Fillmore
Note: in order to get the quote number 42 in time for Towel Day, there may be a slight increase in the frequency of these quote posts.
It’s hard to believe Ronald Reagan actually said something I agree with.
It’s hard to believe Millard Fillmore actually said anything.
At any rate, if you want to know the true spirit of President’s Day, visit your local Target or Best Buy. And if you happen to be a banker, postal worker, teacher or government employee, enjoy your day off. Also, check out one of my favorite blogs, BLAHS winner Millard Fillmore’s Bathtub.
The spirit of President’s Day
I'm not the most interesting man in the world, but I might have the most cluttered mind.
The Millennium Conjectures™ 