“The average Thanksgiving dinner takes 18 hours to prepare and 12 minutes to consume.  The average football halftime is 12 minutes long.  This is not a coincidence.”–Erma Bombeck

“Most Texans think Hanukkah is a duck call.”–Richard Lewis

If all this isn’t enough, my wife is actually preparing a rutabaga as part of our dinner. After all the jokes about rutabagas herein, when I actually held one I thought it was a misshapen duck pin bowling ball.   Happy Turkey Day to all.