A Blog of the Ridiculous and Sublime, by Mark Sackler
“Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you’re the Charlie Brownest!”–Linus Van Pelt
Good ol’ Charlie Brown turns 65 today. And good grief, so do I! Yep, October 2, 1950 brought the world the first daily Peanuts comic strip. And–love me or leave me–it brought me, too. I may talk about sharing a birthday with Gandhi and Groucho, but Charlie is my true kindred spirit. I wonder if he has a Medicare card…
“The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat!”–Lily Tomlin
Per Albert Camus’s The Myth of Sisyphus, it would appear that the best strategy for combating the stated dilemma is to simply keep running the race or navigating the maze, lest one stops and realizes how absurd it all is. I’ll keep at it, if only because I need the cheese.
Who do you look up to?
My list of most admired individuals is made up mostly of scientists. OK, Groucho and Gandhi are on that list, but so are Neil deGrasse Tyson, Michio Kaku, Max Tegmark, David Deutsch, Albert Einstein, etc., etc., etc. Which scientists do you most admire?
“Not only is there no god, but try getting a plumber on weekends.” — Woody Allen
I have a hunch this guy has no trouble getting a plumber.
“I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men.”–Nicola Tesla
I can name at least three. Golf, poker and selective hearing. OK, I can’t prove the first two, but I shouldn’t need to prove the last one. 😛
“There are three things you can do in a baseball game. You can win, you can lose, or it can rain.”–Casey Stengel
brrrrr
Unfortunately, there is a fourth thing that can happen. It can snow. And as that is exactly what it is currently doing outside my window right now, I thought I’d get a head start on this coming Sunday’s Major League Baseball opener and give spring some encouragement. Stay warm and dry, my friends.
“Perfect numbers like perfect men are very rare.”–Rene Descartes
“It’s clearly a budget. It’s got a lot of numbers in it.”–George W. Bush
Cherry is good, too.
It seems that perfect presidents are even rarer than perfect men or perfect numbers. And that goes doubly for perfect web sites, as that “W” quote above came from the inaptly named brainyquote.com. So what better entity to dedicate a day to than the most famous of imperfect numbers, π. On this Pi Day of the century (3/14/15) have yourself a slice of your favorite. I’m in Florida at the moment, so that would definitely be Key Lime.
Cheers
“I would stare at a map of Delaware for hours.”–Ken Jennings
“Men read maps better than women because only men understand the concept of one inch equaling 100 miles.”–Roseanne Barr
http://www.cartoonstock.com used with permission
Away back in the 20th century, my wife referred to the malady described in the first definition above as geographical dyslexia. She suffers from it. I actually use her as a sort of reverse GPS–the surer she is we are going the right way, the surer I am we are lost. Now all we need is a neologism for whatever ails Ken Jennings. Any suggestions?
**OK, I admit it. After thinking this one up, I Googled it and discovered it already exists in the urban dictionary, but c’mon, it’s just too good not to use.
Note: This post appeared yesterday, under a different title, on The Blog of Funny Names
“Never hold discussions with the monkey when the organ grinder is in the room.”–Winston Churchill
In the beginning, there was Outerbridge Horsey. And Outerbridge Horsey begat Outerbridge Horsey, Jr., who begat Outerbridge Horsey III, who begat Outerbridge Horsey IV and so on through Outerbridge Horsey VII, who still lives today. And collectively, The Horseys begat the blog of Funny Names which became the bible of funny names.
Now, unto us a king is given. Behold a new dawn and a New Testament of funny names.
I give you, Oliphant Chuckerbutty. Or in full, Soorjo Alexander William Langobard Oliphant Chuckerbutty. (note: he apparently also was known at times as Wilson Oliphant, but why he would ever go by anything other than Oliphant Chuckerbutty is beyond me.).
No, not that Oliphant.
The esteemed Mr. Chuckerbutty (1884-1960) was a church and cinema organist, as well as composer of organ music. He lived most of his life in India. He was best known for, well, not much other than an awesome name. He did write a brief treatise for young aspiring cinema organists and a single one of his compositions has survived in the classical organist repertory. Unfortunately for his legacy, there has been no call for cinema organists since the invention of talkies in the late 1920’s. And here’s an interesting puzzle: if the World Wide Web has only existed since the 1980’s, how is it that his ancient document entitled To be or not to be–A Cinema Organist is available on line (here)? Would anyone in his right mind actually publish this relic today? No. Aliens definitely walk among us; they built the internet hundreds of years ago and hid it from us until this exposee on The Blog of Funny Names.
There’s not much else to tell about Mr. Chuckerbutty. His grandfather was a journalist named William Oliphant–which might lead one to speculate that he was a relative of the political cartoonist Pat Oliphant. It might; I have no idea. Or maybe he was the inspiration for Tolkien’s oliphants. I suspect that would actually be the organist in the You Tube video below.
Postscript: One of the comments on The Blog of Funny Names made reference to an online picture of Oliphant Chuckerbutty in a bow tie. I looked up that picture and was astonished to see that he is was a near dead ringer for the notorious Arnold Rothstein. As their supposed birth dates are within two years of each other, I’m wondering: brothers separated at birth? Or maybe Rothstein didn’t die from gunshot wounds in that NYC hotel in 1928. Maybe he moved to London and became Oliphant Chuckerbutty. What do you think?
Oliphant Rothstein?
Arnold Chuckerbutty?
I'm not the most interesting man in the world, but I might have the most cluttered mind.
The Millennium Conjectures™ 
Cosmic Quote #58
Non Sequitur by Miley
http://www.cartoonstock.com
Used by permission
I’d bet that if physicists could raise money the way televangelists do, they wouldn’t use it to build themselves mansions and buy themselves private jets. Well, OK, maybe if the mansion was on Mars and the private jet could fly them there with a lab full of experiments. Moral: be careful what you believe in, you might have to pay for it.
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